table of contents

It is nearing. This 6/11. Get Ready. SIX new Bore Parade books and the start of the jaguar uprising press

This press will release small editions of printed chapbooks. In the future, it is going to expand to releases of Book/DVD/CD sets. Jaguar Uprising Press, coming June 11th. 6/11.

I will tell you all. If you are bored enough, I will tell you all.

Listen, lean in, HAHAHAHAH.

I am telling all of you that I am happy right now. I have been happy for a little while. I forgot what it was like to feel happy regardless of what is going on. I still remember what it was like to feel something like nothing regardless of what was going on.

This is a development. I am spending alot of time with a lovely lovely. She sparks me, it is good, we are an even match. There is little hostility, we have 'argued', but it was a fear and shock kind of 'argument' where we both were a little scared of the feelings we stirred up in each other. That scared has settled. Now, there is caring and pulling in. There is a little crying here and there, and soft head stroking with kisses on foreheads. It is loving. I have never felt so strongly about treating someone right. This is a good feeling that carries over into other parts of life.

Sometimes, I still sound upset when I answer a question, even though I am not. This happened tonight when someone asked for a ride. They asked for a ride into town and my yes sounded labored like I didn't want to, even though I didn't mind. I might of sounded labored because of when the person asked, it was sudden as I was walking out the door. He hadn't said much else. I drove him to his house, I dropped him off at his door. I tried to sound happy when he thanked me. I think I did.

Then I drive home, and I think about her, she is miles away. Her cell phone does not have service. I don't know exactly where she is over there. I know she will be someplace new tomorrow. I think about he at home, in a room in a house near sleeping horses. I don't know if horses are near the house. But I imagine them anyway.

TTB moved into my apartment. Now it is our apartment. We have yet to stay here at the same time. He is mystic like that. I tried to eat crispix this afternoon, but I didn't have any milk. I wasn't that upset. I ate pasta from the night before.

The house is clean. While I write this there is an infomercial on about the conair hair straightener. I think about conair. I think about people in portland googling the name of this blog five times. I look at my cat and think about why I need to be drinking more water. It was warm today, I walked to town, I wore sunglasses. I ran into Memphis.

Memphis looked alright. I was worried because I hadn't seen him lately. He told me that people yodel to one another from mountaintops. I thought of the blue yodel. I think he said: "There is the real. The imaginary. And the body." He laughed. He said "And the body needs to communicate. So we have cell phones, humming birds, and yodeling from mountaintops." Whenever I see him he tells me about how I remind him of him at my age. He is five years older than me.

That's all. Look ahead. There is promotional material on the front. There are five books being released at one time from Bore Parade in the summer special release. This release features work of five different people. Kendra Grant Malone, Andrew Boye, Joe Lindsay, Me, and TTB. One of the books is the long awaited satire, ZZZZZZzzzzzz zzz zzzzz. The other four are Serious Lit. There is a nonfiction narrative, a novel, a journal, and a long poem. So when you have all that free summer time and koolaid sitting around, brew up some of the red stuff and sit back for hours of fun from Bore Parade.

a poem by Jordan Branson

cover me with a blanket
over and over and over and over and over and over and over and cover
my face so I can't see and
hopefully not breathe
smother me with smugness
the smugness monster


I am in Tao Lin's brain. He knows I hate the word AFRO!

Tao Lin Launch Party / Jaguar Uprising reading / bore parade

This week is a week worth filming. On Thursday, me-thegoldenbear-ttb-daryl (jaguar uprising) went to NYC. Tao Lin made a video while we were there. In this video Zachary German gets flipped over my back while he is choking me. There are also shots inside my van, where too many people try to ride to dinner with Tao Lin.

On Friday the reading went very well. There will be footage of it up shortly. The footage will include a montage of friendship, jaguar uprising members promoing on each other, and a short reading-match. Mike Young came to the reading. I drove him to Northampton after. Thanks for coming out Mike Young.

***COMING SOON*** On Bore Parade... Kendra Grant Malone... journals... sex... private life... coming soon... Bore Parade... journals from the 90s... coming soon... 'Love Your Friends and Not Your Lovers' from Kendra Grant Malone ***COMING SOON***

More updates later, it has been such an incredible and busy week. I am kind of tired, but not overwelmingly tired. I have reasons to get out of bed. I am lucky.


I walked in and out of building, I touched my hair. Sometimes I scratched my scalp while I touched my hair.

TTB, The Golden Bear, and myself are having a reading / triple threat tables, ladders, and chairs reading match on Friday, May 16th at 7:00pm in the West Lecture Hall of FPH at Hampshire College.

Mike Young, you should come.

The Golden Bear is reading from a (non)fiction narrative about Chris Benoit, the wrestler that killed his son and wife and then hung himself from his workout equiptment. Has the Golden Bear stepped into the abyss? Has he crossed the line of tasefullnesses? Come find out!

TTB is reading from a book about a kid named Fortune. Fortune and his parents travel around a bit. Fortune travels around. They go to the mall of america, a hummer flips on the road. Don't miss out on this action packed acount of a young child in the USA. Bring McDonalds to throw everytime TTB mystically says 'chicken nugget'. Head on over, and be prepared to wipe your two tears off your cheek.

I will be reading from The Gospel of Tom Cruise and Tidal. I don't think I will stop for the entire time I read. The sway will show itself. You will leave your body behind. The tidal wave will get next to your face and stay.

After this there will be a TLC reading match. Bodies and hearts will be broken.

Come find out what it is like to be entertained at a serious lit. reading.

Come dressed as your wrestling persona. Be ready to pose.


This is an illustration I did for a poem in Matthew Savoca's chapbook, 'Tough!' Look for it soon somewhere. Sorry, Matthew, to post it here. But I must. I will promote your book in exchange. This is a more entertaining drawing with the poem that made it exist. You have to see it with the poem or you are missing out, and you are not tough! Only the toughest of the toughest can handle these poems of sheer power and toughness. After reading it, you will understand what it feels like to really be tough.

No Posit Vol. 2

I have a poem in No Posit Vol. 2. It says it is from the gospel of tom cruise, but it is a bit different from they way I used it in the book. There are great things in this e-mag. Take a look around. I have yet to finish reading it. I will talk about it here when I finish. Thanks, Ken.

a short promo from the tao lin comments section on a guy named 'wells' that starts a storyline about the power of the growing internet lit.

Hahahahah! Well, well, wellz, welcome to my stretch limo. Here, I crush the ice cubes and think about people who do not know how to read closely. I think about you, wellz. I pour some dog blood in my glass, and I think about you as I drink it. Wellz, an idiot lost in a forest thinks all the trees look the same.

Hahahah! Wellz, you come here to say I comment in the way that tao lin writes! You come here to say Tao Lin is all of us. Well, I point out, over the internet. I rotate alone in my room and point out at all the writers of the internet. I return from that to tell you, wells, all these things are true.

Look around you, you are surrounded by all the ciceromaniacs, the uprisings, the linears, the alone-malone, the eyeless spider. You are surrounded by the writers of bear parade, the germanites, the writers of ashland-oregon, the 'killen'ers from overseas, lacey's viking ship. You are surrounded by those from no colony, those of muncie-indiana, the gorrellaholics and more are nearing, wellz! All of us exist. We are spread out, and diverse. All of our styles exist. We are really out there.

Now, get out of my limo, here's two dollars, go get some soft serve, and think about us.

The Jaguar Uprising missed Tao Lin's reading ++updated++

Me, The Golden Bear, TTB, and Daryl were in CT on our way to NY. The engine light came on and the brake lights came on. Then the car lost power on the side of the road in CT. We waited for four hours for the tow truck to get to us. 

We took some pictures while we waited. Those are below and next to.  We got home at around midnight after a long trip to somewhere we didn't want to go. I think Tao Lin did something to my car with his sneaky magic. The car is in the shop now. 

When we got back we returned to a party in The Golden Bear's house. There was a keg of 
beer, and some cans. People were playing beer pong there. We went upstairs and drank a little, quietly and tired. Then, we went downstairs and took over the party. The Golden Bear gave TTB a stone-cold stunner through one of the beer pong tables. Then TTB gave a flying elbow to Sam 'the man shotgun' Breslaw. The man didn't take kindly to this. The man rock bottomed TTB through the other beer pong table. Then everyone left and we finished the beers in the Golden Bear's living room.

two days ago the day was 72 hours long, I slept through most of it, luckily

First, here are three short poems:

we sit together on the porch

take this
if you’re thirsty
I think we have some crackers somewhere

we are small animals with short life spans

all of us is casual experience for our universe
our miracles are the size of bodies on planets with vast jungles
we are a dying part of something special that goes on without us
this sandwich is delicious
there are grey plants in the valley
near an upside down car
someone bleeding eats a big mac

while I imagine playing video games

I am making tacos with hot sauce
by the window
looking out of the window
to where it is raining on the street


Tomorrow, everybody go to New York CITY.

I have been reading poems by Susan Scarlata. Right now, she is the editor of Lost Roads Publishers, the press Frank Stanford started in 1976. Read her poems, this is a good one, here, here at coconut eleven.

I read this news article about chris benoit.

Hillary Clinton thinks she is 'just right'. As much as I love wrestling, I lost respect for all of the candidates when they gave speeches on Monday Night Raw. They should have cut promos on each other.

The grey person returns home to find the kitten has turned into a catperson.